Addiction and Knowledge

July 7, 2009 by  
Filed under Wendi's Words

Addiction, Power and Change. Part 1

When I talk about addiction, it can ruffle a lot of feathers. There are many paths to the top of the mountain. (If you have succeeded with AA or 12 step, you have my deepest respect and continued support for your success!)

Many of you know how passionate I am about helping people overcome their battle with addiction.

I got this email just recently and want to share it with you.
Many people suffer alone, afraid to find help, unable to afford it.

Many people suffer alone, afraid to find help, unable to afford it.

~~~~~~ Dear Wendi, I have had a crack cocaine addiction for approx 12 years which has cost me my family as well as two very successful businesses. Since receiving one of your free CDs six months ago my life has had a dramatic turn around. I have just become an accredited life coach and my family is beginning to trust me again. I will shortly be in a position to purchase one of your complete programs which i truly believe is worth every penny. This morning i listened to Wendi’s 2 minute hypnosis and she mentioned the colour red would change everything, Well i went to buy a car today (first time in ages) and guess what? It is red. Thank you to Wendi and everyone at wendi.com for helping me get my life back. (name withheld for privacy) ~~~~~~~~ I am sure you can imagine how excited I feel when I get emails like this… no, it’s not excited actually… more deeply and profoundly touched and honored to do what I do. As you know, my free CD that I send out to everyone who asks, takes you into a future time when you are living the life you want. In the process you experience yourself choosing and experiencing a life you really do want to live. There is also a little magic dust sprinkled in during the session and even though the CD is simple free gift from me, it produces some life changing results. And even for someone who has failed for 15 years at stopping a cocaine addiction, this very simple shift in the core belief about who you are becoming, is enough to end a life shattering addiction. When I read emails like these, I honestly stop, put my hand on my heart, breathe and say thank you to every person, event and step along the way that has brought me to this moment in my life. Knowing how many people’s lives are affected by one person’s addiction- the children, spouse, co-workers, families, neighbors, parents- it becomes a tremendous success in an addict’s life to start to live a powerful life. If it can be this simple to change and addict’s mind, why is the success rate of AA, 12 step, and residential rehab less than ten percent? Why are we still using a method of treatment that was created in the 1930′s? The 12 step program is still the most popular method of treating this devastating problem, yet the success rate is only 5-10%. If we have all this new science and research on how the brain works, and we understand the brain’s neuroplasticity and have solid evidence of power of hypnosis, NLP and we know why “thoughts are things”, why aren’t they being used to end the struggle with addiction? I am sad beyond words to see the statistics on our high school kids and their drug use. They start with vicodin and work their way up to oxycontin. Their developing brains change forever, becoming irreversibly changed to make it impossible for them to feel happiness without the opiates. Next, the opiates remove their ability to weigh consequences. No punishment will stop the addict. Meth takes the brain down a similar path, giving the young person the ability to instantly feel powerful, unstoppable and fearless. What more could a teenager want? And again, there are no consequences that can stop them once their brain is altered. In high school the kids are putting vodka into water bottles and drinking daily, as their brains grow and develop and set them up for a struggle that will take all of their resources and strain their families to the brink. Many of these kids come from good families, and great schools. I have learned that no one is safe in any environment, from the affects of drug use. The children today are the addicts of tomorrow with few good resources for help. And as an adult, maybe you are struggling with drugs or alcohol. Maybe you are unable to stop gambling, pain killers, fighting your shopping addiction, or even fingernail biting! When the brain gets addicted, even if it is not a substance it can still result in an unstoppable impulse. (I once had a client who paid over $1000 to just stop biting his fingernails. If you are a biter, you understand)

Is Addiction a Disease? Is the Disease Incurable? Or are we just misguided?

When you are taught that addiction is a disease, whether it is drugs, alcohol, gambling, shopping, fingernails or internet pornography, perhaps it creates a weakness and limits the ability to have a powerful core belief about living a clean and sober life. If we don’t look at it as a disease, is it possible that there is another model that makes sense? We know more than we used to about the brain. Based on new science, we know that our genes actually change based on our thoughts and experiences. Could it be possible that you are not permanently disabled by addiction? If you have been clean or sober for 20 years, should you really still be identifying yourself as an addict or alcoholic? Do you really want to continue to install the belief that you have a disease, even decades after you have overcome the problem? This results speak for themselves, and new thought is emerging as the evidence based approach for addiction. Evidence tells us that the brain can be changed. But to do this we have to pay attention to what we are learning about the brain and impulse control and neuroplasticity. For me, with the years of research and evidence with my clients and customers around the world, I see yet another element that is critical. This element is the mental and emotional core beliefs that create values and behaviors that determine the direction you take in your life. Bad or good, your life is determined by your deepest core beliefs, creating your values and boundaries, then your behaviors and impulses. And that, as a result of my unprecedented success with treating addiction, is the key. If you don’t have have these values set in stone in your subconscious mind, you will keep going back and relapsing. In 12 step programs they say that “relapse is part of recovery”. Really? Are you sure? Does it have to be that way? Maybe not. Tomorrow, I will explain why I think that it might be possible to end an addiction without fear of relapse. Ever.

What are you addicted to?

Prescription Drugs Meth Cocaine Marijuana Alcohol Gambling Pornography Internet gaming Shopping Perfectionism Stress Anger Food Sex Relationships Drama WoW (you know who you are)

Take a quick survey. Even if you have never had an addiction, please put your stats into the survey.

Be very honest, please. If you have a friend or family member who is addicted, please take the survey questions that apply. TAKE THE SURVEY NOW. As a gift for completing it, I will give you a $10 certificate good toward anything on my site. It’s short. 3 minutes, tops.

Tomorrow- The Fear of Relapse.

Heal The World

Even if you don’t think your life is affected by drug, alcohol or other addictions, think again. It is all around you. Your friends, relatives, students, teachers, (not to mention our courts, jails, and police forces) are feeling the devastating effects of addiction. In the next few days I will show you why you cannot look away from the growing addiction issue for another minute.
Are we willing to be honest about your addiction?

Are we willing to be honest about your addiction?

On Friday- My new Addiction Freedom program will be released to a group of 250 people. If you are ready for a big change, be sure to read your email on Friday!

This will change everything! With Love and Respect, Wendi PS- I have a vision to change the way the world treats addiction. Please help me by sharing this post with at least one person. Remember to take the survey. You get a $10 gift certificate at the end. Please answer honestly! Click here to take the survey.
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Comments

36 Responses to “Addiction and Knowledge”
  1. donald says:

    wendi,i’ve been a meth addict 4 25 years!!!! PLEASE HELP ME,I AM DESPERATE.HOW DO I ORDER THAT CD? CAN I JOIN YOUR ADDICTION PROGRAM?WHAT SHOULD I DO NOW?

  2. ken claffey says:

    Thanks Wendi, without you I am scared to think where I would be today.
    If you were sick and went to the doctor and they perscribed a pill…Now you go back and say Doc this pill ain’t working my condition got worse. Now the doc says sorry thats the only pill that works…you think oh crap I am screwed.God Bless anyone who gets sober and thru AA…I couldn’t for years.
    But wait a happy ending,after getting into Wendi’s alcohol freedom program I haven’t had a drop in over 4 years,and am living life to it’s fullest.Not scared about meetings or rules or steps. She changed the way I think about my self, made all the differance in the world.
    I think the only person who loves Wendi more than me is my wife…Thanks for all you do to fight addictions. Always gratefull ken claffey, North Carolina

    • wendi says:

      Ken!!

      You awesome man. Great to hear from you, and great to know you are still enjoying your life.
      I am sure you have inspired a lot of people along the way with your story. The next thing I want to do is Crete anprogram for high school kids. They desperately need something that works.

      Big hugs to you! Keep in touch,

      Wendi

  3. Sean says:

    Hey Folks,

    I’ve got a ton of comments, I could write a book of my own…here are a few thoughts.

    But here’s a different angle. Why has there been so little in terms of being able to treat addictions?

    Answer: no one cares.

    That may sound cynical, sure the affected people do care. What I mean is, the people that make the money.

    Who would fund some research in this area? Why would someone create grant money for that? Who really cares. There aren’t a lot of vested interests here.

    The victims are collateral damage to the economic engine that runs the country. (so I’m not a bleeding heart socialist…actually I’ve got 2 business degrees and run a business)

    Think about it. Let’s just take alcohol. The government make a ton of money on it via taxes (especially in places like Canada) They even control the distribution. The advertising money spent is obscene. They buy media…TV, newspapers, radio etc. That money has a multiplier effect on our economy.

    Take that whole argument down that path…obviously I could go on. You finish the job on your own.

    I’m 9 months sober. With the help of AA. I got Wendi’s free alcohol program a while back. Listened a couple times. Didn’t work.

    I’m not blaming the program at all. Perhaps I didn’t use it properly, or long enough or whatever.

    btw I’m also a certified hypnotherapist and Master NLP practitioner. Long time student of spiritual principles, A course in Miracles etc etc. Still went down the wrong road.

    At the moment, with respect to AA, I feel like the hypocritical Catholic…”sure I’m Catholic, I just choose to ignore those little things about premarital sex and birth control”.

    For example, I struggle to accept the AA premise about being powerless over alcohol. My workaround is to say to myself that my “ego” is powerless, but since I’m an incarnation of something larger i.e universal spirit…that part certainly, the real me, isn’t powerless.

    It isn’t a perfect fit…but it’s working for now.

    While I’m at it, a couple more thoughts.

    AA is like using dynamite to kill a rat. It’s not efficient but it’s effective (yeah I know the stats). What I mean is it’s the broadest possible approach to cover as many bases as possible.

    Sure almost always alcohol abuse is a symptom of other underlying issues.

    Maybe many folks could learn to become social drinkers. But to be safe it’s easier to just say…don’t take that first drink…ever. That covers everyone. (You won’t hear that at an AA meeting)

    I’ve NEVER heard that relapse is part of recovery. You almost get guilted in to staying…counting birthdays, having parties etc etc. People slip and don’t come back because of shame…maybe it’s different in your part of the world.

    Someone who hasn’t been there and experience it themselves will never have 100% credibility…sorry Wendi, nothing personal or malicious meant.

    It’s like knowing “about” what an orange tastes like versus actually tasting it.

    All this sounds good, especially to someone on the outside, it makes perfect sense. But they are just words.

    How could someone with my knowledge and skillset still end up down this road?

    Good question.

    Another thing. AA is like anything else. You go to high school. There are drugs there. You can choose to take part or not. Same with AA. Sure there are some folks who continue to whine and struggle for years. But there are those who are positive, happy, successful…You can choose to take part or not. You don’t have to be living in the past and beating yourself up forever just because you are involved with AA.

    I like to ask this question. Do you like being sober? Or do you hate being drunk? Your answer may very well determine your success in reaching and keeping sobriety.

    And the great obsession of every drunk is to be able to drink like “normal” people.

    Is that a possible outcome or is your program designed for a lifetime of abstinence?

    As always, my mind is wide open, and look forward to what you plan to bring to the table Wendi.

    That was a long and winding road..phew!

    Feel like I just left a meeting ;)

    Take care folks.

    Sean

  4. Madolyn says:

    I clicked on ‘Take the survey’ and all I got was ‘Thanks for taking the survey” What happened?

  5. Sandy says:

    Wendi,

    Thanks for the wonderful work you are doing and for the lives you are touching. I am a hypnotherapist and I had a life changing experience in assisting my daughter with the release of her heroine addiction. She did not attend AA or NA. She did not go to rehab. She changed her mind and in turn….her life changed as well. I feel there is a new sense of awareness coming to the surface around addiction. It is not a life sentence, it is not a disease……it doesn’t have to cost tens of thousands of dollars to relinquish the experience known as “addiction”. Resources such as yours are putting light beams of hope out to the masses and in turn lives are being changed and SAVED! I applaud those who have recovered via AA, NA or rehab as well. Frankly, I am happy for anyone experiencing an addiction who finds the source of change that works for them! You are a lighthouse, Wendi….. for those wanting to come in from the dark sea of addiction.

  6. Steve Pacquette says:

    Hi everyone. Just want to say thank god for Wendi Friesen. When you have a serious aaddiction every penny goes on the drug and as you cry for help nothing is available because you have no way of paying. The free CD that wendi supplies has changed my life for the better and i will be in a position very shortly to purchase a few CD’s not only to help myself but to keep Wendi.com alive so it helps as many people as possible. It really does work the testimonial at the top of the page is me. I am now an acredited life coach with a mission to help as many people as possibe. Thank you Wendi

  7. Judy says:

    I was sober off and on for 7 years until I went to a 12 Step model recovery program for 30 days. I would not have made it without the follow-up program that rehab offered because my husband had been emotionally abusive (worthless piece of shit) over my abuse of alcohol. They put me through a program of learning to speak out and become independent. Of course, that didn’t go over so well with him, but it sure helped me. Feeling worthless made it difficult to speak up in 12 step meetings, but I stuck it out for about 5 years and also did co-facilitating addiction groups through Kaiser Permanente where I had gone for counseling through a good part of my addiction. I continued those groups for several years as well. During that period I also began to listen to tapes about improving my life and designing goals for myself. I finished my teaching credential and went on to complete a Masters in Curriculum Development and have taught successfully for 22 years. My last drink was January 26th, 1984. I believe that AA offered the support I needed to begin with, but, as you say, you have to take responsibility for your recovery and your growth in life. I attribute many things to maintainng recovery, the latest being EFT! There is so much out there and the information is so available. I do feel that the outreach part of AA is vital because you feel that you are giving back some of what you recieved from the program and it helps you to look back and say “there, but for the grace of God, go I”. Helping others always helps us to grow. Thanks for your program. I would like to be part of it just to see whom I may help with it.

  8. Anna Duggan says:

    Hi Wendi

    You go girl! As a Hypnotherapist of over 15 years I have always held the exact same opinion about rehab centres and 12 step programmes as you. They are designed to “disempower” people and to hold them to their addiction. Being in the business of helping others to empower themselves these programs go against everything I “know” to be true.

    Thank you for your passion with regard to Addiction and for flying the flag and exposing the great misperceptions with your documentary. Will you be putting a link on your website to it so we can see it downunder?

    With gratitude and sending love for you and your journey with Sean

    Anna Duggan
    New Zealand

  9. julie says:

    After seven years of in and out of a.a and a very expensive stay in the Priory, I could not get to grips with the fear based 12 step programm. I did however purchase Wendys Alcohol freedom set, and did her two day course in London, wow, great at first, then more slips until one day I decided, I do not want to live in fear of Alcohol for the rest of my life, I realised it was controlling me, every thing about my life revolved around alcohol, once I saw the pattern, then I changed, it is seven months now since that day, and I know I will never drink again, I used the same method with smoking after 40 years, 30 a day, and that was five months ago, and I know the same I will never smoke again, NOW IF ONLY I COULD DO THE SAME WITH CHOCOLATE, HA HA.

    Go Wendy you are amazing I have almost every piece of work you have made, and I am probably your biggest fan. Thank you for being you and caring.

  10. Wendi,
    All I can say is that you are an inspiration to all of us seeking to facilitate change in the world. Thanks! Continued success and prosperity to you on your journey!
    Mary Ellen ;)

  11. Hypnochick says:

    Hi Wendi,
    As you know, I lost my Sister 4 years ago to drug addiction. She was in and out of about 10 rehab facilities and several group homes over 20 years. Now her son has been going down the same road and it’s so scary and frustrating knowing all to well the lack of success these places currently offer. I’m beyond excited about your new program and knowing you and your work, I forsee BIG change in the way addiction is treated! Way to go!

  12. Hi Wendi,

    What can I say about you and what you’re doing? I came from a background filled with addiction, violence and abuse and know personally and deeply of how it warps and ruins lives and your perspective on this great adventure called life. Your hypnotherapy over the years has helped me so much, to deal with the darkness of my past. Your influence has been essential to my healing and growth and hypnotherapy really does work. That is why after many false starts and vague ideas of where I wanted to be going, I chose hypnotherapy as my passion and life’s work.

    I offer you my deepest gratitude and wish you all the happiness and peace the universe has to offer.

  13. Hi Wendi,

    I’m excited to hear your new program. Even though I stayed clean while I was part of GA, I attribute that to more of my own resolve than the benefit of the program. My belief system is incongruent with most of the basic tenants of the 12 step model, I found it to be dated and perceived GA in Las Vegas to be supernazi.

    I have been disappointed in the lack of alternatives especially for gambling. There must be biochemical triggers, even if it is not as directly obvious as in alcohol and drugs.

    I found more empowerment using the phrases “I choose not to gamble” and “I’m not a good gambler” to acknowledge that it’s a problem but not brainwash myself with the “I’m a compulsive gambler” stigma.

    If you need a “not good gambler” for your project, I’d be happy to be a guinea pig!

    :) Christy

  14. Bob Collier says:

    How would you define an addiction in one sentence?

    • Making the choice to start but not being able to make the same choice to stop

    • mary says:

      Hyrum Smith defines addiction as: “any behavior that produces short-term pleasure at the expense of long-term pain to the addict or those around the addict.” In Franklin Covey’s book “First Things first” Covey describes addiction , I think he may have quoted someone, I don’t own a copy of the book. Basically Covey defines it as any behavior that temporarilly takes you away from an unpleasant feelings/emotions and creates a sense of pleasure. So addictions could even include TV, arguing, the internet, gossiping, etc. In the book Covey describes the addition to the “sense of urgency” that has taken over so many companies. My personal addition is definitely TV and the internet. I can’t tell you how many times I just fall into either to tune the world out, it makes me kind of sick when I think of all the productive things I could have done with that time, and how many times I tuned out when I stuff that needed to be completed.

    • julie says:

      Something having control over your life without your total consent.

  15. Wendi is doing such a service to people with addictions. Her heart is so big and open to healing our world. I encourage anyone with an addiction problem to work with Wendi.

    There is a quote that says. ” If you save a life it is as if you have saved the world.”

    Seth-Deborah

    • Hi Seth-Deborah! Was surprised to see your name but guess we all check in to see what others are doing. While I love hypnosis for this, I truly believe that NLP is quicker and faster. I just may take a little look at the freebie to see what it contains. Sometimes Wendi can be a great teacher. Wishing you and Wendi well~Marjorie

  16. Coni says:

    Wendi,

    Thank you for getting the truth out there! I am an addict,but never admitted it before now. Addiction has affected my life more than I wanted to believe. It has not only made me miserable, it’s making me broke. My savings are gone, and I am not sure where to turn. Im looking forward to your new addiction program because I need it program BADLY!

  17. sandy says:

    I am a meth addict. I have been fighting this addiction for over two years and have lost every possession and friend I have ever had in the process. I have currently been clean for 25 days and this has been and is the hardest struggle of my life. I am 44 years old and I need to kick this habit.

    I have been the person crawling on the bathroom floor searching for any remainder of meth that might have fallen to the ground. I am the person who shot up about 250 cc’s a day just to survive. I am the person who spent almost ten thousand dollars in five months to support my habit. I am the person who had multiple addictions at the same time, meth, gambling and sex. I am the girl next door who you would never suspect and yes I am an addict.

    It started so simple with perscription pills following a surgery, then dealing then marijuana then meth–wow the progression was fast and furious and of course I had a male partner who was also addicted.

    The only thing I did not do was sell my body–but I came close on several occassions although I did many other degrading things. I am still here. I am currently involved in a 12 step program and have a n/a counselor.

    I am scared to death because in the two years I have not been clean this long and I am searching for anything that can help me stay clean. Because I know my pattern and that is to use.

    For the first time in two years I have an address. I am looking for a job after I have severely damaged my career credibility and I do not have a car.

    Please if your program works then I am in 110%!!!!! I need help and am searching for anything to keep me clean.

    • wendi says:

      I would be honored to help.
      On Friday, I will give you access to the program so you can get started. It will be my pleasure to give the entire program to you as a gift for the first month!

    • Cathy says:

      Amen to that congradulations on your 25 days! I wish I could say that. I am one year older and using for longer. I am scared to death So scared I have not yet quit. I want to desperately. I look forward to Wendis Friday email mabe she can help me too. Thank you for sharing

      • sandy says:

        Cathy–I have been using for years and I was a hard core user. No matter how I got there the fact that I am an addict is the bottom line. I will pray for you and stay with this website because Wendi is fantastic. Stopping starts one minute at a time. I am still struggling but have been clean for 28 days now. God Bless. Sandy

  18. Shelly Upson says:

    Hi Wendi,

    Thanks for getting the truth out there. I have been trying to talk my husband into writing a book with a new way to treat addiction maybe after he reads this he will be more apt to do it. He is a Certified Chemical Dependancy Counselor but currently works as a motorcycle mechanic because he was so disappointed in the way addiction isn’t treated in our country.

    seashellly form Twitter

    • wendi says:

      Ask him if he will be a guest on my documentary I am making. Perhaps he wants to collaborate on the project. It is an expose of the inadequacy of rehab.

      • Brandon says:

        Are you seriously doing a documentary? That is awesome! Let me know if there is anyway I can contribute.

        • wendi says:

          Yes, we are going to start interviews of addicts, rehab counselors, experts in brain science and experts in addiction treatment that works. The intention will be to show the effects of how the different methods work and their success or lack of it.

      • Shelly Upson says:

        Yes! My husband says he would be more than willing to help you in any way he can. All he has ever wanted to do was to make a difference and show people that there is a better way. Please feel free to contact us at my email address.
        We will look forward to hearing from you.

        Shelly and Chris

  19. Sheree says:

    wendi, is your free cd available as a download and what’s the title of it? thanks heaps

    • wendi says:

      You can get that CD, and I just lowered the postage cost to only $2. The postage was $5. I sent out a new email with the link to it! Thanks for nudging me to get a link out to you all.

  20. Adam says:

    Your messages are very uplifting. I am happy someone out there cares enough about others to do what you are doing for these fortunate people.

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